24 posts tagged “vox”

Holy crap! I missed my second Voxiversary!

By almost three months!

This can only mean I have been distracted because (choose one):

• my life has become a living hell the likes of which no one should have to suffer.
• my life has become a living hell the likes of which everyone should have to suffer!
• my life has become a living purgatory which a few people might have to suffer under certain circumstances.
• the earth stopped turning.
• the earth was turning with a hestitant grinding motion, which proved to be worn bearings.
• Vincent D'Onofrio showed up demanding money, or at least some coupons.
• I was buried under an avalanche of doorknobs.
• the Spanish fly didn't work.
• I realized after years of denial that Pikachu does not have Focus Fist.
• no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't fit the bottle inside the toy ship.
• Tyra Banks is even higher maintenance than you might think.
• I learned the Pope is not only Jewish, but shows up at Rotary meetings wearing gigantic lapels and a cravat.
• the double pneumonia I contracted after being caught in the rain at that Reds game took months to clear up.
• Buddy Guy keeps calling me asking where he can get one of those cool Tripwire "got integrity?" T-shirts.
• I only went to Washington, D.C. to visit, but I ended up ensnared in partisan politics, bureaucratic stonewalling, and unrelenting harrassment from the shoe-leather lobby.
• using Twitter to post every aspect of my personal grooming requires a serious time commitment.
• buying a product called "Rolex Viagra Stocks Cialis Luxury" can be a very, very costly mistake.

So, thanks for your patience and understanding. To get things under control, I will probably need a flashlight, an analog wristwatch, an assortment of small loudspeakers, and a street map of Decatur (Illinois or Georgia, it doesn't really matter). I'll let you know.

It's true. I can't even come up with my own phrasing for a subject line.

It's as if I have nothing to blog about. This is the kind of crap that's coming to mind:

• Vox's hyperlink button is broken in IE 8. You have to use Compatibility View.
• Pizza is expensive.
• Work takes up a lot of time.
• I am completely out of touch with TV and movies.
• My motherboard is hosed.

Am I too guarded to be an effective blogger? Too busy? Too distressingly indifferent? So similar to all the brilliant, rich, handsome geniuses you already know about that there's no point in repeating the story?

I'm sorry. The worst thing to blog about is having nothing to blog about. I'll shut up. I guess I should bring back Doorknob Monday. Or perhaps Elevator Button Wednesday. (Why is that button pointing down and to the left? What is this, the Wonka Factory or something?)

Crazy Elevator

Which new friendship formed in 2008 is the most special to you? How did that person come into your life?

Without a doubt, the most important friend I made in 2008 is you, [insert Vox neighbor name here]. And I do consider our friendship to have been forged in 2008, even though

1. you had been sullying my blog with your "comments" since 2007.
2. technically, the restraining order was still in effect.
3. I blacked out all of 2008.
4. we've been married for over 15 years.

I knew you and I were on to something special when you commented on my post about

1. my first experiences with a girdle
2. using Twitter to hit up old ladies for cash
3. the detailed two-hour saga of trying to get the bathroom window to close
4. my equipment

and you said my profile picture reminded you of

1. Vincent D'Onofrio.
2. John Holmes.
3. your second ex.
4. Gandhi.

Then I started following your blog, and discovered the one-in-a-million combinations of things we both liked, such as

1. Peter Gabriel and index funds.
2. cotton candy and cyanide.
3. rainy days, loose women, and individually-wrapped butter pats.
4. drinking and driving.

Soon I felt you were a true friend and confidante, and I really felt for you as you went through

1. being kicked down the stairs by the supposed paraplegic you'd been caring for.
2. getting the chewing gum off the squirrels.
3. causing the collapse of the American auto industry.
4. that window.

I want you to know that our friendship means more to me than the occasional comment here on Vox. I think of you often, and it makes me want to

1. try the egg salad.
2. park outside your home until you show up, then make my move.
3. hump the washing machine during the spin cycle.
4. punch John Mayer.

I mean it. I love you,

1. man.
2. girl.
3. babe.
4. kemosabe.

1. Is anyone else getting a lot of timeouts lately, especially when loading individual blogs?

2. Does anyone know how to back up a Vox blog, including neighborhood-only posts? I can do it manually, painstakingly, but that's ridiculous--especially for 200+ posts.

Sheesh. So much going on, so few blog entries (or for that matter Tweets). I promise I'll get caught up. Any day now. I owe you a couple of songs, too, rounding out the complete posting of my old band's album. So hang in there. I know the suspense is making your lives painful and difficult. (Painful and difficult? What is this, an ad for laxatives?)

On this day one year ago I wrote my first Vox post.

A hearty thank-you to everyone who's made Vox a positive experience...family, old friends, new friends--even some new friends I've met in person!--and of course the good folks who keep Vox running.

I also want to thank Tito, Fabio, my great-granduncle Nancy, my attorney Phil, my staff of physicians at The Clinic, my barber Ted, my barber's lawyer's uncle's doctor Steve, Jeff at Custom Body Fluid and Stain Removal, Mistress Tarantula at The RubberWorks, Chris at Circuit City for helping with my "blender issue," everyone at Queen City Sausage and Chrome Plating, that one dude with the primo shit who never comes around anymore, Buffy and everyone at Fluffer Squad, Al Feldspar at Micro Center for noticing that my "computer" was really just a cardboard box with a flashlight taped inside, Jeb for supplying the "goat grease," and of course God Almighty, with whom all things are possible, at least so they say around these here parts.

The Queen City Voxers' Meetup on Saturday was a success! In attendance were Amy, M-----l, Mr. Guilt, Nyght, yours truly, various spouses and little ones, and, all the way from Seattle, homebody!

Vox Meetup Group Photo

The weather cooperated, with storms passing us by to the north and temperatures avoiding their Cincinnati worst. Ault Park proved a terrific place to get together.

Ault Park View 1

Ault Park View 2

The kids had a great time while the adults chatted...

Collecting Pillbugs 1

Collecting Pillbugs 2

And everyone enjoyed their Vox goodies!

We're Only in It for the Shirts

2 comments

Amy took a bunch of pictures, so I will point you to her Vox where you can read more. Thanks to everyone for coming; it was great seeing you all, and meeting new folks!

The Queen City Voxers group is having a meetup! All Voxers are welcome to attend, as are significant others, children, etc.

When: Saturday, July 12, 2008 11:00 AM – whenever

Where: Ault Park playground, 3600 Observatory Ave., Cincinnati, OH 45208. We'll look for each other at the playground marked by the red X below. If it's raining, head for the shelter to the north of the X.

Ault Park Map

Eats: bring your own picnic! If you feel like it, bring something to share too.

RSVPs: not essential, but appreciated.

Questions? Concerns? Suggestions? Post a reply to this announcement, or send me a private message.

Hope to see you there!

Way back on February 10th, I said I that would, for the remainder of that month, write a private response to each QoTD and, if I liked the result, post it here. I also claimed I would report back at the end of the month whether I'd stuck with it.

Amazingly enough, the exercise was a success: I did answer each QoTD. Often the responses were flip and glib, but that's fine. It got me jotting down a few daily notes.

But then I didn't just forget to report back on it here; I also dumped the whole exercise once the stated time was up. And any keeping of daily notes went with it.

So: time to re-up the commitment and start answering those QoTDs--or anything I find that provides a daily catalyst. And this time I'll leave the timeframe open-ended. Most of the results won't show up here, but it's still a public commitment. Because if I don't do the work and someone here calls me on it, I could look vaguely stupid to as many as one (1) persons, a dire consequence that could cost me up to fifteen (15) seconds of ill-defined embarrassment. Motivation enough. I'm off!

I think if you graphed my overall Vox activity by time of day, there'd be this total spike around 10:30 PM.

Sheesh. So predictable.

This calls for some 80s time travel! (File this under "Holy crap--I haven't seen that in at least 20 years!")